Premise Beach » Premise Beach

Scrapezilla

Kyle Lees — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 17:33:51 +0000

Thank goodness I’ve got Tattoo Dan and, to a different (but equal!) extent, Yvette. They verbalize the dirty jokes that I’m too darn mature to make in good company. As I type this, I’m totally wearing a tie, even.

NoJanna Pants

Kyle Lees — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 05:01:54 +0000

Thunder Bay Hearts Duluth, Hates Warhol

Kyle Lees — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 06:02:18 +0000

These shirts really are real, as evidenced by this link. If you’re an interesting person who likes to wear interesting garments, you might be interested in buying one! And guess what, homie: you can. kylelees{at}ymail(dort)com is the address to hit me up with any requests regarding these high quality, not-made-by-children shirts, which retail at $17.50… [...]

He Ain’t got No Body

Kyle Lees — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 05:15:41 +0000

So, has Tattoo Dan been Krang, warlord of Dimension X, nemesis of the Ninja Turtles, this whole time? Read on to find out! Nope it was just this time. Thanks for reading on!

All-Starfield

Kyle Lees — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 05:15:23 +0000

I would post this one a few after Scott Kurtz did an awesome Watchmen spoof, where Jon was Night Owl, kinda sorta. I’m not an idea theif, honest! Hey, if I were trying to steal his ideas, I would steal a character who always wears sunglasses, and only eventually takes them off in a very [...]

MadDogz.net

Kyle Lees — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 06:00:51 +0000

I was shocked to see that this domain name hadn’t been bought up by the makers of Truck Nuts (or is that Truck NutZ). MadDogs.com had been, of course, but that seems to be a running tally of how much the Iraq war has cost the U.S. taxpayer so far. So, to sum up: by [...]

Still Better than Dreading Week

Kyle Lees — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 05:01:09 +0000

Reading Week is what we call Spring Break up here in the cold nation of Cranada. Oh, by the by, we renamed the country. Try to keep up. Yes, it’s about cranberries.

Ladies’ Night

Kyle Lees — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 06:17:08 +0000

And now we see that Yvette wears the pants. It’s true y’know: you can’t see below anyone’s waists, but she is indeed wearing pants. Awfully big step up for womyn everywhere, those pants.

See, She’s Hitting Him

Kyle Lees — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 05:00:03 +0000

Notice the evolution? I know what you’re thinking: “Kyle, I checked the very first strip, and it doesn’t look anything like that first drawing of you!” Well, the first hundred Premise Beach strips aren’t posted online. If you look at that crude caveman, I’m sure you understand why I chose to omit them. Okay, I [...]

Dreamin’ Again

Kyle Lees — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 05:00:29 +0000

This is not what Martin Luther King Jr. meant, and even a hick like me knows that. Regardless, this is what I did this week for MLK Day, and I got through it without mentioning any weird sex dreams, and at least I know when it is, so hey, good on me.